Despite increased international focus on women, peace and security, women are still often viewed as blank slates upon which acts of violence are committed, rather than full human beings with roles to play in negotiating a meaningful peace.
The role of 'innocent victim' is a blameless one, but is also one-dimensional, failing to take into account women's active membership of their own societies.
Similarly, when we talk of heroism and valour, women are often excluded. This feeds into the perception that we are incapable of playing an active role in the cessation of armed conflict, with that role reserved for (male) military actors, who in their turn are recognized as enduring only limited types of vulnerability.
The only way to address this complex problem is to consciously examine the assumptions we make about the roles and experiences of men and women in armed conflict.
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Great strides have been made in the area of addressing some of the most common and horrific acts of violence committed against women in times of armed conflict.
One of the proudest achievements of the international community in recent years has been the long-overdue acknowledgement via a series of UN Security Council Resolutions on the subject of women, peace and security that acts of violence against women are not merely extensions of the domestic sphere, nor inevitable and unavoidable realities of war, but acts which can constitute threats to the security and stability of the state.
Similarly, although it took until the 1990s for rape to be recognized as a war crime and tried as such, today there is unequivocal recognition under international law of the criminality of sexual violence and its use as a tool of genocide or a weapon of war.
However, statistics show that although there is increased recognition of the gravity of acts of violence conducted against women, women are not yet able to fully access the mechanisms put in place to prevent, mitigate and address these forms of violence.
In the 14 peace processes conducted in 2011, only 4 women participated as full members of negotiation teams. In 2012 only 3% of UN military personnel and 10% of UN police personnel were women. Although this figure is steadily improving (in 1993 women made up only 1% of uniformed UN peacekeeping personnel), progress has been slow, and the fact that only 13% of peacekeeping personnel are female means that many women from violence affected communities face extreme cultural barriers in reporting and seeking redress for acts of gender-based violence, removing their ability to take an active role in their own protection.
The flipside of this problem is the need to acknowledge the ways in which men can fall victim to gender-based violence in armed conflict, for example as survivors of sexual violence or abuse.
Men's participation in armed conflict is often viewed as perpetually active. When casualty numbers are collected, age and gender are frequently used as shorthand for participation - in the absence of other indicators, men and boys between the age of 15 and 40 presumed automatically to be actively involved in the fighting.
When men experience gender-based violence, it is often not viewed as such, and not given the consideration it would warrant were equivalent acts being committed against the women of a war-affected society.
Heartbreaking statistics collected in conflicts as diverse as Sri Lanka, Bosnia and Congo, not to mention the sexualized interrogation techniques used in detention facilities such as Abu Ghraib show that sexual violence against men is by no means isolated.
Yet it is not talked about, either by local communities nor by humanitarian agencies. Research carried out in 2009 indicated that only 3% of humanitarian organizations working on issues of sexual violence in armed conflict, made any reference to male victims, and even fewer ran programs designed to provide them with appropriate and dignified services and support.
Nobody would argue that women's and men's experience of armed conflict is the same. Women and men suffer differently, and therefore require different protection mechanisms geared at addressing their individual needs and building on individual strengths. However, international law does not require identical protection, it requires equality of protection.
For this equality of protection to be achieved, we must cease relying on stereotypes and start seeking to represent the individual lives and experiences of men and women, girls and boys, recognizing the ways in which each can be vulnerable and each can be strong.
Hear Dr Helen Durham Head International Law and Principles at Australian Red Cross and the Australian Human Rights Commissioner Gillian Triggs discuss how the law protects men, women and children from sexual violence during times of war on Thursday 22 August in Sydney. To book into this free event click here.